Ok, so my friend and I were really close. We hung out all the time and never got sick of each other. Then about 3 or 4 weeks she met this guys. I was fine with this because we all hung out together and he wasn’t always around. Well, now about 2 weeks ago, the two of them started claiming they are an official couple. Since they’ve been going out I’m losing my mind it’s like all she talks about is her boyfriend and I barely get to hang with her anymore.
I am already sick of them together. It’s like she has no life outside of him. And he never leavers her side..Argh! When I told her about how I felt she said had the nerve to say I was jealous???! No I don’t have a boyfriend but that does not mean I’m jealous. I just wanted my friend back.

How do I get my friend back without seeming jealous?? Should I say anything anymore?? What should I do?

-Lex, 16

Hey Lex,

Girlfriend & Boyfriend relationships are always a fragile subject. You have to be careful when sharing your thoughts with your friend regarding her relationship. Remember, its not what you say but how you say it. You have learned a very important lesson at a very young age. What Lesson is that? Only give advice when it is solicted. No one likes when people give their opinions on their life and or relationships. Should this discourage you from talking with you friends? NO. In any relationship communication is Key, its just all in how you communicate. You should never leave anything unsaid in a relationship, it will eat at you in the inside.

I suggest you sit down and talk to her about how you are feeling and how it is affecting you, and share with her how much your friendship means to you, and how much you value it. Maybe you are a little jealous, but that is normal. Its usually just the 2 of you and now you have to share. Just be the bigger the person, and seek to develop a relationship with him as well, in a strange way it may even bring you and your bestfriend closer, she will feel like you support her totally and that you are happy for her.

Also, let me let you in on a little secret. At your age, nothing is permanent. Who knows how long he will be around. But you want to make sure that you are the one who stays around. I cant even tell you who my boyfriend was at 16. As you get older things change and so do people. I want you to always value yourself and know your worth.

-Nikia Pope

As women we are always looking for ways to enhance our beauty and physical appearance, and most times we are looking for enhancers, creams, new regimens to try;  when all we really have to do is to take care of the body and skin that we already have.  Self- Preservation?! We can’t neglect ourselves and then look for a quick fix to combat our laziness (yes, I said laziness) we are all guilty of it, even me, I confess. I have learned that if I spend a little extra time simply practicing some self love then I really have little need for extra products. I have shared a few beauty tips below. I hope this helps you as much as it has helped me.

Bedtime Beauty Tip No. 1: Always wash up.
I’m guilty of skipping this step — and I’ve got to stop! Sweat, dirt, makeup, and the day’s grime … all of this sits on our face at night, clogging our pores and aging our skin. So use a gentle facial cleanser and lukewarm water before going to bed, and follow up with a mild toner. (I will too. Pinky promise.)

Bedtime Beauty Tip No. 2: Never sleep with your hair in a ponytail.
No matter how exhausted you are, it’s important not to leave your hair elastics in, because they can cause breakage. If you want to avoid morning tangles, try sleeping on a satin pillowcase. It’s easier on both your hair and your face.

Bedtime Beauty Tip No. 3: Brush and floss every night.
If you skip the dental care at night, you’re not just in for a huge lecture at your next dental cleaning; you might actually be making yourself look older too. Brushing removes stains between and around your teeth, and you’ve got to floss too: Poor gum care can cause your gums to recede, making your teeth look longer — and you older!

Bedtime Beauty Tip No. 4: Let your feet breathe.
Keeping your feet in socks may keep them feeling toasty, but it also creates a moist environment where foot fungus can breed. Yikes!

Bedtime Beauty Tip No. 5: Get your beauty sleep.

I know you really want to stay up late to watch your favorite show, talk on the phone, or peruse the internet, but beauty sleep is no myth. Your skin needs time to heal and restore and get its glow back on.

-Nikia Pope

“Ok, so I really need advice! I’ve liked this guy for  all of my high school but this year i really got to know him.   I found out he’s kind of a jerk! He can be rude,disrespectful and sometimes just plain mean to me! So whenever I decided to drift away he somehow reels me back in. He then becomes sweet and nice again. My friends tells me I need to leave him alone but it’s something about him that I can’t. My friends tell me that I’m always attracted to the “bad boy” types and I don’t know why. To be honest when he acts nice it’s kind of weird and seems soft. A part of me would rather him be rude sometimes. It’s kind of manly you know? What should I do? Should I leave him alone? Is it wrong to want a manly guy who’s not mushy all the time?”

Oh, how I remember being in your situation when I was in high school. Its just something about those bad boys right?..LOL. It’s perfectly normal to have those conflicting feelings that you are having. Its like an internal battle between your feelings, between right and wrong, between you following you heart and doing what others are telling you. It’s of the utmost importance that you figure out what you want in a guy, what characteristics that he must have, its time to set your standards and they should NOT be debatable. See, if you don’t figure out what you want in a guy he will keep showing up in your life in each guy that you date, he may have a difference face but the same issues, problems, complications, will all be the same.Trust me, I’ve been there before.

Weigh your options. Be honest with yourself. What is your heart and intuition telling you?

-Nikia Pope